Post by Shauni on Nov 6, 2009 12:29:28 GMT -5
I really REALLY hate to ask this question. I mean I really think people are ridiculous about the mary sue thing. However, in-between working on my own original projects I have the urge to write a few fanfictions. And, naturally, I want to post some of them up on ff.net if I do manage to finish them.
But I'm a little worried that for one of them, one of the characters is 'too much'.
And normally I wouldn't care, but it's a transformers fic idea and the fact the character in question is a human is a strike against it already. ( not EVERYBODY there hates human characters, but a lot do and aren't afraid to admit it. So they'll tell you they don't like your story because there's a human char with importance.)
Sooo, I guess I should explain some things and let you guys answer. All I ask is that you read everything if you're going to post.
And honest answers are nice. If she's still too much even with the things I added in to try and not be sueish, tell me. But..constructively? No insults please.
Anywho, here we go:
- The story itself it set in an AU or alternate universe. For it I am combining plot points from several branches of the fandom into one thing. And it's one of those dark, angsty, 'what if' AUS. First of all it's not just the character in question having trouble. It's not an entirely happy universe.
In fact, the character in question is an AU twisted version of herself. Normally she is sweet and happy and caring and crap, but in this? >.> Haha, no. Not in AU.
- Her parents are MIA and she thinks they're either dead or captured. They're not really, but she doesn't know that, thinks they are, and it is definitely the driving force to her angst and attitude.
- The parents were more or less turned away from a safehouse by certain government officials. But so were a lot of other people, so its' not just them. She was eventually persuaded to go to a safehouse for kids and teens by her parents- however bitterly and reluctantly as she didn't want to leave them.
- She gets manipulated by a canon villain. She basically runs away from this safehouse place with another char who has similar feelings to the lies about how everybody is safe, runs into this villain, and gets involved in a plot. and, like a bunch of humans in the story- for reasons- can be sought to help with some weird thing I won't waste my time explaining.
Concerning the villain and plot thing, my efforts to try and make it less sueish made me decide that:
- She isn't completely in the dark about this plot. It's not like 'oh she thinks he's such a nice guy and that he'll help her and is shocked to figure out he's such a meanie!'
No, she knows the entire time his intentions are evil. He won't share the intimate details of the ploy so she isn't sure EXACTLY what he has in store, but she knows it's bad for everybody in the city.
- Even knowing that initially, she doesn't care. She knows people will get hurt, and it doesn't bother her. She's developed anger toward the people who are safe inside the city because she and her parents and others aren't, and basically wants them to feel her pain- not even bothering to consider the fact that it is not their fault what happened to her and the others. So yes, she's spiteful, vindictive, and selfish. That's why she agrees to go along with this canon villain. Initially she WANTS them to hurt.
- She starts out serving as a little spy and saboteur, jumping through hoops for this villain- with the promise she'll be safe AND get her revenge at the same time. She's very self-serving at the beginning. And a bit of a villain/anti-hero herself, not always doing her best to disguise her feelings toward people safe in the city and not feeling bad for any feelings she hurts.
- She does eventually change and 'wake up' and start down a path of becoming a better person. But I'm trying NOT to let this happen instantaneously.
- She will have regrets about some things she's said and done, but not all. She will still stubbornly believe some of her initial actions and feelings were well justified and will not admit to total fault on her part.
- She will want to back out of the plan for getting cold feet. Partially because she may start caring about some people in the city, but a great deal of it will be cowardice on her part. And then IF the villain calls her out as his little helper, instead of just breaking down and admitting it- apologizing and explaining herself so that people might be more understanding, she'd rather lie through her teeth in a panic and blame anybody but herself.
:B I do plan to attempt to give her some merits, but those are just some of the things.
So, taking that list of flaws into mind and comparing it with some of what I'm leery of...what do you guys think? Borderline sueish? Totally sueish? Or am I a little overly worried for nothing and it's fine/they balance each other out?
But I'm a little worried that for one of them, one of the characters is 'too much'.
And normally I wouldn't care, but it's a transformers fic idea and the fact the character in question is a human is a strike against it already. ( not EVERYBODY there hates human characters, but a lot do and aren't afraid to admit it. So they'll tell you they don't like your story because there's a human char with importance.)
Sooo, I guess I should explain some things and let you guys answer. All I ask is that you read everything if you're going to post.
And honest answers are nice. If she's still too much even with the things I added in to try and not be sueish, tell me. But..constructively? No insults please.
Anywho, here we go:
- The story itself it set in an AU or alternate universe. For it I am combining plot points from several branches of the fandom into one thing. And it's one of those dark, angsty, 'what if' AUS. First of all it's not just the character in question having trouble. It's not an entirely happy universe.
In fact, the character in question is an AU twisted version of herself. Normally she is sweet and happy and caring and crap, but in this? >.> Haha, no. Not in AU.- Her parents are MIA and she thinks they're either dead or captured. They're not really, but she doesn't know that, thinks they are, and it is definitely the driving force to her angst and attitude.
- The parents were more or less turned away from a safehouse by certain government officials. But so were a lot of other people, so its' not just them. She was eventually persuaded to go to a safehouse for kids and teens by her parents- however bitterly and reluctantly as she didn't want to leave them.
- She gets manipulated by a canon villain. She basically runs away from this safehouse place with another char who has similar feelings to the lies about how everybody is safe, runs into this villain, and gets involved in a plot. and, like a bunch of humans in the story- for reasons- can be sought to help with some weird thing I won't waste my time explaining.
Concerning the villain and plot thing, my efforts to try and make it less sueish made me decide that:
- She isn't completely in the dark about this plot. It's not like 'oh she thinks he's such a nice guy and that he'll help her and is shocked to figure out he's such a meanie!'
No, she knows the entire time his intentions are evil. He won't share the intimate details of the ploy so she isn't sure EXACTLY what he has in store, but she knows it's bad for everybody in the city.
- Even knowing that initially, she doesn't care. She knows people will get hurt, and it doesn't bother her. She's developed anger toward the people who are safe inside the city because she and her parents and others aren't, and basically wants them to feel her pain- not even bothering to consider the fact that it is not their fault what happened to her and the others. So yes, she's spiteful, vindictive, and selfish. That's why she agrees to go along with this canon villain. Initially she WANTS them to hurt.
- She starts out serving as a little spy and saboteur, jumping through hoops for this villain- with the promise she'll be safe AND get her revenge at the same time. She's very self-serving at the beginning. And a bit of a villain/anti-hero herself, not always doing her best to disguise her feelings toward people safe in the city and not feeling bad for any feelings she hurts.
- She does eventually change and 'wake up' and start down a path of becoming a better person. But I'm trying NOT to let this happen instantaneously.
- She will have regrets about some things she's said and done, but not all. She will still stubbornly believe some of her initial actions and feelings were well justified and will not admit to total fault on her part.
- She will want to back out of the plan for getting cold feet. Partially because she may start caring about some people in the city, but a great deal of it will be cowardice on her part. And then IF the villain calls her out as his little helper, instead of just breaking down and admitting it- apologizing and explaining herself so that people might be more understanding, she'd rather lie through her teeth in a panic and blame anybody but herself.
:B I do plan to attempt to give her some merits, but those are just some of the things.
So, taking that list of flaws into mind and comparing it with some of what I'm leery of...what do you guys think? Borderline sueish? Totally sueish? Or am I a little overly worried for nothing and it's fine/they balance each other out?
